RYAN - UNITED STATES

Profile: Kristi is the daughter of Molly, my girlfriend of a ‘lifetime’ (won’t say how many years)!

Molly has spent many visits here at the LAZY M intently observing Lane’s ABC’s Method of Horsemanship.  Quite a number of years ago she watched Lane successfully coaching Kristi riding ‘D2’ - over a tarp and performing other training maneuvers.

Something in this deeply resonated and became crystal clear to Molly.

Lane’s methodology, patience, timing and confidence impressed her so much, she easily transferred his ABC methods to her ‘human relationships’ – especially those with her grandchildren.   Molly has helped her daughters – Lisa and Kristi successfully incorporate Lane’s ABC’s into their ‘child rearing’ practices as Ryan’s story shows!

Awareness – Learn to understand and know where children (and horses) are ‘coming from’.

Boundaries – Children WANT Boundaries (and so do horses!).  They both ‘push’ for them!

Consistency – Children constantly ‘test’ to make sure our consistency and boundaries are SOLID (just like horses!)

Children AND Horses are looking for GOOD LEADERSHIP - NOT POOR DOMINENCE!

Ryan, Kristi, Teyla

Kristi's Comments:

Ryan and the Stairs Story

I had a parenting experience a few months ago that really had me thinking of Lane’s ABCs with his horse training. 

Our method of discipline is to ask our children to choose between doing what we ask, or sitting on the stairs.  My three year old son, Ryan, was acting impolitely and demanding something from me.  I gave him his options and since he didn’t want to be polite, he got to sit on the stairs. 

I left Ryan on the stairs and came back to check on him every few minutes and ask if he was ready to ask politely.  Well, I checked on him and asked him every few minutes for THREE hours!  And this was three hours on a day we were having company for dinner and I had yet to get to the grocery store!  It tried my patience over that length of time but thinking of the ABCs helped me hang on for that long! 

I knew that once we started this I had to keep going until Ryan decided, on his own, to choose to be polite.  I could easily picture Lane working patiently and seemingly endlessly with a horse until the horse decided to do what Lane asked. 

Lane could always wait one minute longer than the horse and that’s what I had to do with Ryan.

Eventually Ryan was done on the stairs by choosing to ask very nicely for what he wanted.  It may have taken a long time but it was a very valuable learning experience that had lasting results.  Since then, Ryan has been much more polite on his own, without being prompted by me. 

I think of Lane’s horsemanship principles often as a parent and find them very helpful in those times where it would be easy to get frustrated and impatient.  Instead, I remember the ABCs and know that the patience and effort is worth it for the results they produce!